Okay, here goes. Epiphany time. It's now useless for me to hate my parents for the divorce. I can't keep avoiding my mom just because of what she's done to my family. I can and will always hate their decisions, but now that they are both happy with where this is going I need to meet them where they are at and not let this junk get in the way of trying to be a family anyway. I will always hate what they have done. I will hate that they said that the marriage wasn't good from the first place, therefore making me and the other kids essentially mistakes in their life. A bad idea to bring into a bad marriage, or an attempt to bond together 2 people never meant to be together. So, I'm going to start talking to my mom again, start being around, maybe even get lunch with her and really talk.
I think I'm going to ask my dad if I can wear his wedding ring. He doesn't anymore and I would really like to wear it as a reminder of the good times and something to see to remind myself not to mess up the way they did.
Next epiphany, I had this one awhile ago, but am just now getting the courage to put it down and really talk about it. I'm happy for her, So incredibly happy for her. No matter how much I ever could have loved her she found someone who will do it better than I ever could have and that can give her EXACTLY what she wants in life, a family, something I could never have been able to do.
I'm all out of epiphanies for today.
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